I WISH
by curlyycurls
Summary: Stiles is the nogitsune which means he might end up dead and this is what he could say if he actually died. This is a poetry/letter to Stiles' family and friends. It's kind of a suicide letter.. It's so sad and it relates to other ordinary people as well. Since he sometimes has a difficulty talking and making sense, here is a written piece of paper... Just Read It! :)
1. Version 1

**I WISH**

_I wish that my two __eyes __never seen the __daylight__._

_I wish my tears __would __completely __dry __up._

_I __wish __my eyeball would __just __pop._

_I wish __everything __was just a __blur__._

_I wish it'll __go __away and __leave me __alone._

_I wish __I __could actually __stop it__._

* * *

_I wish I couldn't __think straight __and __put together __any of my thoughts._

_I __wish __my __mind __went completely __blank__._

_I wish I was __lost __somewhere very __far away__._

_I wish my brain got__ lost somewhere __in my dreams and __never __returned._

* * *

_I wish __the air __in my lungs would __disappear__._

_I wish my __lungs __would just __explode__._

* * *

_I __wish __I had __no functionally __heart._

_I wish the __veins__ in my heart would simply __burst__._

_I __wish __my heart __would stop __beating__._

* * *

_I wish I __hadn't __known about the __feelings__._

_I wish __it __wouldn't __hurt __so much, when dealing with the pain._

_I wish it was __very __simple, like __blowing off __some dust._

* * *

_I wish I __wasn't __here._

_I wish I was never conceived in the first place._

_I wish I __never __really __existed__._

_I wish my nucleus __never__ contained __DNA__-__molecules__._

_I __wish __my very first cell never __evolved__._

* * *

_I wish __I __didn't wish this __upon myself__._

_I wish __I could __be like you and __everyone __else._

_I wish I was sorry for what I'm __thinking about__ and all of the other __times__._

_I wish I was __sorry __for what I'm about __to do __to you._

_I __wish __I was sorry for having to __put you through __this again._

_I wish that you __someday __could and will actually __forgive __me._

* * *

_I wish __that __it had __never __started._

_I wish it __never __happened to __me__._

_I __wish __there was a way to go back and __change __it all._

_I wish that I wished from the __beginning, __that __I wouldn't let it__ come __this far._

* * *

_I wish I __hadn't __known __the signs __for it to be leading to this exact __moment__._

_I wish __it __was buried and already __over__._

_I wish I __already did __this thing a long time ago._

_I __wish __I hadn't been __thinking __about it for so many years. _

_I wish every __single __one of you would now __accept it __and finally let it __be__._

* * *

_I __wish __I still didn't __know __what this actually __means__._

_I wish I __hadn't __known of its existence __at all__._

_I wish I had __no __clue __about what __I was really going to say and do._

_I wish __it __would be about __something else__._

_I __wish __you weren't here __so you'd __find out this way._

_I wish __you would have __been far away, so it'll take months, maybe __even __years._

* * *

_I wish I wasn't __going to speak up__, concerning that __special __thought._

_I wish I now __wasn't __saying __that I wish I was __dead__._

_I wish __I __wasn't wishing it'll __set me __free._

_I wish I wasn't wishing it'll make it all easier._

* * *

_I wish you've __never __would have learnt about __my hidden truth__._

_I wish I __could __take it __all __back._

_I __wish __I hadn't been telling you that I'm actually __considering __it._

_I wish __I __hadn't been __telling you __at all._

_I wish it was __all __made __up__._

_I __wish it was __all just a __big __fat lie._

_And __I __wish I didn't __wish __it._

_I just __wished that I'd __still try__…_

* * *

**Hello.. Yeah so I'm kinda new to all of this.. But if you would let me know what you think I'd appreciate it..**

**And it ight make no sense to some of you because poetry is that weird if you haven't written it yourself at least, but if you do understand credit to you ;)**

**And thanks.. **


	2. Version 2

**RHYME VERSION**

_I wish that my two eyes never seen the light._

_I wish everything was just a haze._

_I wish it could leave me alone, I surely was hoping it might._

_I wish this would still only be a phase._

* * *

_I wish I couldn't think straight and put together a single thought._

_I wish I was lost somewhere far away._

_I wish I wasn't going against what I've been taught. _

_I wish that you would've stood by my reasons either way._

* * *

_I wish the air in my lungs would disappear._

_I wish my lungs would just blow up._

_I wish I was scared to death by an unstoppable fear._

_I wish I would be able to stop._

* * *

_I wish I had no heart, just nothing at all._

_I wish I hadn't known about the way I was going to feel._

_I wish I was hoping for itself to completely fall._

_I wish that it wouldn't have been such a big deal._

* * *

_I wish my heart would stop beating._

_I wish it was very simple, like blowing off some dust._

_I wish it wasn't, only the me I'd known, that I'll be deleting._

_I wish it wouldn't have hurt so much, but in the end it must._

* * *

_I wish I was never conceived in the first place._

_I wish I really wasn't here._

_I wish that they could just stop starring at my face._

_I wish that I hadn't this feeling of despair._

* * *

_I wish I never really existed._

_I wish my very first cell never evolved._

_I wish that it was easy and not this twisted._

_I wish this wasn't a thing that needed to be solved._

* * *

_I wish I already did this I've been thinking about for years._

_I wish it was already over and by now in the past._

_I wish it didn't led to me shedding any tears._

_I wish I would have done it and very superfast._

* * *

_I wish I was sorry for what I was thinking._

_I wish I could be like you and everyone else._

_I wish that I didn't always feel like shrinking._

_I wish that by doing this, it helps._

* * *

_I wish I was sorry for what I'm about to do to you._

_I wish I was sorry for having to put you through this._

_I wish I was sorry but I was hurting too._

_I wish that you all someday understand that it was me I miss._

* * *

_I wish that it had never begun. _

_I wish that it had never really happened to me._

_I wish there was a way to go back and change what was done._

_I wish it never came as far as for you to actually see._

* * *

_I wish that I still didn't know what this all is about._

_I wish I had no clue about what I was really going to say._

_I wish I wasn't having any kind of doubt._

_I wish it would be about something else, like telling you I was going to stay._

* * *

_I wish you weren't here so you'd find out._

_I wish you would have been far away, so it would've taken longer._

_I wish that you'd still hear me shout._

_I wish for your sake I've could have been so much stronger._

* * *

_I wish I wasn't actually saying that I wish I was dead._

_I wish I wasn't wishing it'll set me free._

_I wish you've never would have learnt the truth, I so hardly said._

_I wish every single one of you would still accept and let it be._

* * *

_I wish I could take it all back, bit by bit._

_I wish it was all just a lie._

_I wish I wasn't telling you I'm actually considering it._

_I wish I wasn't telling you at all, that I want to die._

* * *

**_Fell free to let me know what you guys think! I'd appreciate it! :)_**

**_And I know perhaps this content makes no sense but to those who understand thumbs up!_**

**_It's hard understanding someone else's poetry because it's personal and weird if you haven't written it yourself.._**

**_But anyway thanks.. ;)_**


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